Yes, you read that title right. After years of careful research and a refusal to “sit down on the job”, experts may have finally found the best posture for you to do your business.
Although 99.9% of your trips to the bathroom for a #2 have likely occurred on a toilet, the excretory experts of the world have some bad news for you… you’ve been doing it all wrong. Sitting down has worked in the past, but what about chaning up the position? Standing seems awkward and messy, but what about squatting? Could that be the answer? What a time to be alive, when the pooping problem of the population may have finally been solved…
Before we discuss how this new strategy will completely change our lives, let’s find out why we’ve been pooping wrong for all these years.
Squatting vs. Sitting
As it turns out, those strange squatting toilets that you saw on your vacation to Singapore weren’t primitive toilets, but actually futuristic ones. That being said, squatting is far from a new approach to defecation. Imagine the nature documentaries you’ve seen, animals you’ve personally seen doing a #2, or even your own behavior when you’re on a camping trip without an outhouse. For hundreds of thousands of years, squatting was the normal way for people to defecate, but everything changed once modern toilets and “decorum” joined the poop party.
Squatting is actually a very natural approach to pooping; children certainly understand that. Have you ever watched a child that hasn’t quite been potty-trained, but really needs the bathroom? They adopt a squatting position because it feels the most comfortable; as it turns out, it also makes it easy to get those bowels moving and empty!
When we sit down on a toilet, our digestive system adjusts slightly, changing the “anorectal angle”. Within our colon, we already have a small bend or kink that helps with incontinence; essentially, it helps us control our bowels. When you sit down on a toilet, that kink becomes even more pronounced, making it more difficult to push out your feces. This causes many people to “push”, which applies pressure on your rectum, colon and pelvic floor, causing inflammation, discomfort and a colon that isn’t completely empty.
When you squat, however, that anorectal angle improves significantly, and in many people, the kink in their colon disappears completely. This allows for a quick and complete emptying of your bowels, leaving you healthier and more regular. By eliminating painful pushing and unnecessary stress on that sensitive area of your body, you also lessen your risk of developing hemorrhoids and can eliminate constipation issues more easily.
On a more serious note, research has linked colon disease to the impractical way that we poop, urging many people around the world to seek out an alternative. Unfortunately, with billions of modern toilets around the world, it seems impossible to ever transition back to a squat and poop culture.
The biologically correct posture
When you sit down on your normal toilet, by placing your feet on the stool, you will elevate your knees, basically adopting a squatting position. Now, with the pressure on your puborectalis muscle, your colon can easily empty itself without any obstruction, which will mean less time and strain in the bathroom. Even this small adjustment to your internal organs and external habits can make a huge change in your life, but adding this type of squatting potty to your bathroom decor is hardly a change at all!
Your family’s health will improve, your guests will enjoy their “exotic” experience, and you can finally go to sleep with the knowledge that you’re pooping the right way. Everybody wins.